With Love and a Healthy Dose of Fear

"Everything you have ever wanted is on the other side of fear"

I saw this quote today in my morning social media scroll. Another inspiring pep talk from the cyberspace abyss. Great advice for some who maybe sitting around thinking and dreaming of what they want in life and stalling right?! Those lovelies might read that post and feel the need to make the extra push, putting one foot in front of the other and make their dreams happen! Cue Eye of the Tiger...(the old school Rocky one with the guitar lead in not Katy Perry)

 "Step out of your comfort zone dammit and JUST DO IT.....Be Fearless!!!"

Welcome the mania, the hustle, the I have no time to look both ways before I cross the road because I have to run. Welcome to the unsustainable state of fight or flight. The above BE FEARLESS pep talk may be the type of motivational speech you want your favorite football team to receive right before they take the field in the fourth quarter but for those of us living our life, we need a more balanced style of coaching.

Guess what follows the mania that ensues after the BE FEARLESS pep talk and self-prescribed hustle? Depression. Burn out. Illness. Stupid mistakes. Regret. The loss of the self. 
The desire to push and make your dreams happen is actually taking more from you than it is making a life for you. The collective notion that pushing hard and moving fast to make dreams happen is the only way to get anywhere is challenging your health. Those engrossed in the hustle are moving too fast to allow for the support needed to make life sustainable. Over time they become disconnected from themselves and from their loved ones. Lost but still hustling...and for what?  The mentality leaves us with the illusion that overcoming our fears of not reaching for the highest of high is more important than our overall well being. The mind, body and spirit scattered like shards of glass on the highway waiting for a rescue crew to sweep them up. Sadly, no one can save you but yourself. 

I feel a little recognized fear is healthy. It keeps us from jumping off the proverbial cliff into the hustling black hole. The emptiness that will swallow you up only to spit back a few pieces to your family and friends. The pieces spat back are not the ones they recognize. Most often you don't even recognize yourself. They are the fragments of the person you once were. There is a time for your fight or flight response, it is what has allowed us to evolve into the human race. However, there must be rest where there is motion. Love for ourselves in the face of opposition. And maybe a little healthy dose of fear to keep us safe from our ego. 

There is a balance that can exist when we acknowledge all sides of ourselves. Peeling back the fragmented layers to uncover the part of ourselves that can see clearly, in yogic terms the purusa or purusha. This is the part of the self that despite our ever evolving life remains unchanged, it is our true north.  Some will say the purusa is the divine within. It is not to be confused with your intuition, the purusa is more like a mirror. This mirror can be clouded or smudged at times by the fingerprints of uncertainty, ego, fear, etc. This is often when we feel disconnected from ourselves or our divine nature, a time when we cannot see our truth or our purpose clearly. Luckily just as we can use Windex to clean the mirror to see our physical shape, we also have "Windex" or tools for the mirror of our mind. Self-study or Svadhyaya is the life long journey of consistent self inquiry " Who am I?" "What am I" "How can I be useful?" This process of self study does not come in the form of a single book, weekend retreat or by liking an inspirational Facebook page. It is the time we spend with ourselves in reflection, after meditation, journaling, spending time in nature, practicing yoga or reading the sacred texts.  It is the time spent away from the hustle, free from distraction. It is where we connect to the divine within. It is necessary and life saving and once the process begins it must never end. This coming back to the self will bring the hustle to a halt. And that my dear IS OKAY. 
As one of the lovelies in my life has told me over and over, "Ain't no empire gonna fall".Know this... It's okay to press pause, it's okay to reflect, it's okay to have a little fear. In fact it's necessary for your survival. In creating a life you dream of make sure you are actually LIVING the life you created. Dive in and reflect. 

With Love and a little healthy dose of fear,

Shelly